Monday, November 3, 2008

Does A Father Ever Know Best?

What do you do with a little boy who will be 9-months old tomorrow? I suppose handcuffs might work. Maybe a straight jacket. Maybe some medicines would be helpful.

Evan is very active! Evan enjoys life and playing and having fun. He especially enjoys playing in the kitchen. I'm not sure why, but he does. The problem with that is that the kitchen is just a little too dangerous for him, even if we have childproofed it. Plus, I can't always see him when he crawls behind the couch into the kitchen.

So, Friday afternoon, I came up with a temporary solution for dealing with Mr. Evan's adventures!

Kind of sad, isn't it? I'm a grown man. I have more than one degree. I'm usually a pretty smart guy. Yet, at 9-months, Evan has just about defeated me already!

And in case you are wondering, my temporary solution only worked for about 5 minutes. After that, he found a way around it!

And then the chase was on again!


  1. Steve: I have always felt that active kids will either keep you young or make you older...depending on your perspective. How's the aging process coming? :) Look at it this way: you only have 17 years and 3 months left. Gotta love 'em.

  2. Bill...thanks for the encouragement...I feel so much better now!

  3. Steve,

    Gotta confess here - I like Evan's version of this better.

    Having been in your spot, well... except as a mother.. I totally understand about the whole kitchen thing. Gates became my friend. (Read: not a chair.. they didn't last long.)

    Sometimes having a child means completely rearranging spaces. I really do think it's more for the parent's sanity than just the safety of the child.

    And since you're old.. well, that definitely throws a kink in with it too. Kink in the back.. Kink in the neck... Kink in the knee..

  4. Ooohh Steve Camey is sharp today. I like the kink remarks.

  5. There went a knife through my heart Camey...

    Maybe it is for my sanity...that could be the case. However, the opening from our family room into the kitchen is approximately 12 feet across...haven't seen many 12 foot gates, except those on the gated communities some live in or those across a cow pasture...can't you see me installing one of those in my house! Mrs. M. Steve will really love the cattle gate...

    So, now I am sure started off sharping around the G household...

  6. It will keep you young til at least the teen years then the age thing racks up against ya!!!!

    The kinks are a hoot from Camey!! Sorry Steve just had to add that.

  7. I think that is why you are supposed to have kids BEFORE you're 30. That didn't happen to us, either.

    Now, my 12 year old daughter is asking about going to dances........ AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

  8. Haf...I appreciate you jumping in there with a great way to begin my Monday...I KNEW I should have saved this posting! word..."NO!"

  9. Duct tape, dude!!!! You can duct tape him to the wall!!!

    What? No, I don't have a *personal* testimony to its effectiveness. Really.

    Just make sure the tape doesn't touch his skin, and it will be completely painless when you are ready to release him.

    Or, if that is too extreme, velcro. Take huge amounts of velcro, fasten it securely to the wall. Make him a little harness out of the other side, and scccchhhhhhhhllleeeeeeeppppppp. he's still.


    (For anyone that might cruise through and is humorly-impaired, those are not serious suggestions.)

  10. Karma, you get the award for the best suggestion to date! I love the duct tape suggestion...only if I can keep Evan from trying to eat it!

    After have an EKG and various heart monitors attached to me (I had, at one point, 18 leads to my chest)...and then having those leads ripped off my chest...what's a little skin for him to lose! It'll make a man out of him!

  11. Ok - the kitchen - let him burn himself or cut himself one time and your problem is solved.

    Camey -- you are funny, honey!

    Gates are only good until they learn how to climb over them or figure out how to unlatch them.

    Kids will make you think you never even went to first grade let alone college. You'd be better off replacing your name with his on your degrees. Yeah. They'll make you feel pretty stupid sometimes. Especially if they get burned or cut in the kitchen that you not only double gated, but also double child proofed.

    They are Houdinis in disguise. If I spelled Houdini wrong then whatever. I am not clicking spell check today.

    Heidi Reed

  12. Heidi...great comment...sounds like you've been down this road, what two times already...and you willingly are going down it are a BRAVE woman!

  13. I spent a bunch on money and hours installing child-proofing the kitchen cabinets when we moved in to our previous house, and the observant little "twit" had the nerve to figure them out in less than 5 minutes. He watched us get in and did the exact same thing. Of course, his brilliance paid off and he's on full scholarship to college. ;-)

    Gates - yes gates. Does anyone else remember the octuplets? Barbara Walters went to visit them when they hit 2yrs old, and they had two gates stacked to keep them contained (read:safe), and the boys were climbing all over them like monkeys in a cage.

  14. Knife in the heart? Wow! Sensitive and dramatic!

    I'll have you all know... I got up from lunch with a kink in my knee.. I named it Steve.

    No wonder my sons don't like highly secure gated communities! Brings back childhood memories.. Gates only worked until they figured out how to climb over them or unlock them like Will said..

    Steve? I think you would definitely be in trouble with Mrs. M Steve for the cattle gate. It's clear from how Evan talks about her - he likes her better.

  15. Will? Yes, I do remember that Barbara Walters story. Monkeys indeed... I cannot even begin to imagine try to keep up with all of them!


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