Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Rolling, Rolling, Rolling All the Way to Jail

Authorities on Florida’s east coast have arrested a man in a wheelchair who they say robbed a credit union on Merritt Island and hid the money in his prosthetic leg. I promise, I’m not making this stuff up!

Brevard County deputies say 45-year-old Christopher Warren Reed was caught Friday afternoon about 10 minutes after they say he robbed Space Coast Credit Union. Reed is a paraplegic who uses a motorized wheelchair. I have to wonder at this point why it took 10 minutes to locate Mr. Reed.

Investigators say he came into the credit union about 4:00 p.m., told a teller he was armed with an explosive, and demanded money. He left with an undisclosed amount of cash—don’t all robbers leave with an undisclosed amount of money?

Mr. Reed told deputies that two people had threatened him with a gun, told him to commit the robbery, and were going to take the money for themselves. He was charged with robbery, grand theft, threatening to use a hoax explosive device, and aggravated assault.

So many questions come to mind here. How did Mr. Reed get away? Did he have a getaway van parked in the handicapped parking spot closest to the bank? Did he simply roll down the sidewalk, heading toward his house? Or, did he simply try to blend in to his surroundings?

I suppose it takes desperation to rob a bank. Or, maybe it takes stupidity. But, someone should remind Mr. Reed that the excuse he offered police has already been used, and if memory serves me correctly, those police officers didn’t believe that crook either!

Well, hopefully the bank got their money back in a timely manner. With our economic downturn, they’ll need all they can get.


  1. Sounds like he tried to get a leg up on the rest of us in these rough economic times.

    Sorry. That's wrong, but I had to.

  2. Michael...that's terrible, funny, but terrible!

  3. Why does his last name have to be Reed?
    That's all I care about.

    heidi (last name has been removed to protect the innocent among us)

  4. Heidi...I did find that name thing quite a sick kind of see, with a name like mine, that NEVER happens! Only thing good about a name like mine.

  5. Just because Bill gets up so early, he gets all the good lines! I just simply refuse to get up that early to beat Bill to the punch (line).

    I'll just be content with all the "left-over" lines.

    I just can't think of any right now.

  6. Rick...the problem is that you got up SO late that you thought Michael was Bill!

  7. Man! Am I out of it today or what?

    Sorry Michael!


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