Just Look in My Purse. It's On the Top!

[Not the actual purse in this story. My wife has this thing for chickens. I thought she might actually like a purse like this!]

I can’t resist telling this story. closer to the end of it, you’ll better understand.

Apparently, a longtime employee of a major Queens, New York, jewelry manufacturer stole a staggering 500 pounds of gold by smuggling it in her handbag over a nearly six-year period, prosecutors announced.

Teresa Tambunting, 50, of Scarsdale, New York, allegedly stole the shiny merchandise by concealing it in a false bottom she created in the lining of her pocketbook, Queens District Attorney Richard Brown said.

“With gold trading at nearly $900 an ounce, the defendant is accused of establishing a virtual mining operation in Long Island City which siphoned off millions of dollars’ worth of the precious metal from her employer,” Brown said.

Officials at Jacmel Jewelry in Long Island City, where Tambunting had worked for 28 years, noticed they were missing up to $12 million worth of gold in January. After an investigation was launched, Tambunting, who became a vault manager in 1991, arrived at Jacmel’s offices with a suitcase containing 66 pounds of gold with an estimated value of $868,000. Tambunting allegedly told detectives that she had taken the gold, Brown said. A subsequent search of her home revealed 447 pounds of fine gold. The thefts allegedly occured between January 2004 and April 2009, Brown said.

Tambunting was released on $100,000 bail and ordered to return to court on May 19. She faces up to 25 years in prison if convicted on charges of first-degree larceny and first-degree criminal possession of stolen property.

Wouldn’t you like to see the purse she was carrying around! A fake bottom. A purse big enough to carry gold out unseen?

My grandmother carried a large purse. I think she thought she had to. You see, my grandmother sold Tupperware. And, I’m convinced there was not a piece of Tupperware that wouldn’t fit into her purse. Who knows, she may have actually carried one of everything Tupperware had in inventory, it sure looked that way. By the time of her death, I was convinced that my grandmother no longer carried a purse, it was more like Samsonite! Yes, her purses were that large.

I once heard someone give the best description of what hell will look like—the inside of a woman’s purse! Pretty accurate description, if you ask me.

Ever so often, my wife will ask me to get something out of her purse—as all guys know, that’s dangerous territory and shouldn’t be entered unless invited, and even then, with extreme care. Tonya actually carries a small purse. But, trying to find my way around in there is next to impossible. And, Tonya has a reason for that, “Everything goes to the bottom of the purse!”